Have you ever looked into the eyes of a senior citizen and wondered what that person had experienced in life? Where had he or she traveled? What tales can the individual share? How did he or she handle major hardships before there were modern conveniences? Did the person invent anything? How did he or she love someone for a lifetime, when there were surely difficulties in the relationship? What life lessons could this person share that might possibly make life easier for others? In that one individual, so many riches lie right there-unburied! It's like precious jewels, lying on the ground for anyone to pick up if he or she knew to ask.
I enjoy visiting the elderly at retirement centers and nursing homes. We often gathered groups of young people and others from our church to go and sing songs for them and pray with them to brighten their days. We realized, however, that our days were also brightened. Some of the people who lived in the nursing homes didn't have their full faculties, so it was difficult to communicate with them. But almost all seemed to understand a smile and a gentle touch. Some would tear up when we showed them kindness and smiled and hugged them-especially when the kids hugged them. The kids' actions brought back many memories. We also saw those tears when we sang some of the old hymns, and they joined in. Oh how they enjoyed those old hymns!
Occasionally, I would find myself alone in one of their rooms as we went around inviting them all to the grand room, where we gathered to sing. It was not a rare occasion to be cornered by someone who was so excited to have a visitor, and he or she would start talking and sharing the latest news of family and such. At first, I would always try to escape from the room and get back to the main group, so they wouldn't worry about me and because I usually helped lead the singing. I later found myself realizing this person needed to unload. I wondered how long it had been since anyone had listened to him or her. A few of these individuals became long-term friends, and I still take the opportunity hear their words of wisdom. Their perspectives are different from those of someone my age and sometimes foreign, as I had never considered their ideas. To hear one dear woman tell me how she endured her longtime marriage, which I had believed was a "happily ever after" marriage, because we always saw them smiling and so kind to everyone. This was jaw-dropping! She told me she stayed with her husband after discovering his long-term affair and how she survived. There was wisdom in staying with him rather than leaving and letting the new woman take over the life she had worked her whole life and marriage to achieve. I was amazed at her strength, courage, stamina, grit, integrity, and capacity for forgiveness. I wished I could have talked to her while I was going through my marriage difficulties. Maybe things would have turned out differently.
I now listen to my dad much differently than when I was younger. I would venture to guess that most of us can relate to that statement. When we are small children, we believe everything our parents say is gospel. As we enter our teens, we suddenly think we know more than our parents. We may even believe they are clueless and out of touch with reality. We certainly don't want to waste our time listening to their advice from "back in the day," and we can't possibly see how those stories are relevant in this day and time. Then we have our own children and start needing advice from our parents. That's when we realize they aren't so out of touch after all. By this time, we are so busy we don't really have time to listen to much detail; we are just looking for quick fixes to our immediate crises. It isn't until we grasp that our parents may be slipping away that we realize we should have taken the time to ask more questions. We should have gleaned more wisdom from the treasure chest of riches that was there just waiting to be tapped.
More than once during visits to retirement homes, people have told me they are just waiting to die. They tell me they are finished-their lives are finished-and there is nothing left for them to do. I understand that part of their attitude is because they are unable to go places. I'm sure the loneliness is extremely painful as well. I strongly believe that as the gears slow us and we aren't as mobile or as busy, we enter into a new era and a new opportunity.
While we have the time and our memories, we should leave our wealth of advice and wisdom to our families and other loved ones. When we put our wisdom in writing, it can be passed to future generations as well. In biblical times, multiple generations lived together in encampments. As transportation modernized, and with the industrial revolution and technological advances, families moved farther apart in search of job opportunities, thus depriving grandchildren and great-grandchildren of the privilege of learning and gleaning resources from their elder family members.
Check out "Unburied Treasure" 'A To Leaving Your Legacy' at http://www.catherinetorrez.com/